COVID-19 has made me say things that in hindsight sound stupid. With assuredness and confidence, I would say, “I can’t imagine this going into May, we’ll have it under control by then,” and a few days later there are naysayers or soothsayers (whichever you prefer) saying, “Think again Ms. Know-it-All”. COVID-19 has afforded me a rare opportunity to listen more than act and that’s what I urge us all to take this time to do.

Let me tell you a bit about myself – I’m a former events specialist who has been laid off as a result of COVID-19. I have a background in public health and economic development and used to manage a café in town on weekends. I have no shortage of opinions and COVID-19 is a diabolic convergence of everything that would pit me against myself. I had to cancel five events in March alone. My job was made unnecessary and is seriously being called into question for ever returning. My background in public health and current connection with many business leaders are at odds with each other and on top of all that, I’m a very social person! I cannot wait for a quality cappuccino, conversation with a new friend, and access to my local libraries.

But all that will come soon enough. Now is the time to think on what is most important in our lives and cherish it. I don’t want to be espousing opinions without adding some helpful content. It’s my two cents and I hope you’ll find it useful.

Firstly, I urge you to consider your future selves, not your current self that is yearning for a time before COVID-19 and a desire to return to business as usual. Whenever I’m in a grey area, not knowing what’s right and wrong and not sure which is the lesser of two evils, I ask, “What would future Sam be proudest of, what would she want me to do?” I’m honored to be living in this time with all of you. I want us all to get through this, having pulled together and reflected on what’s most important.

Second, I suggest you refrain from thinking about things in the first-person perspective because it increases stress. Instead think about yourself as if you were your best friend who was struggling. If you treated yourself the way you treat your best friend, you’d have more helpful advice and you could stop the stress spiral that might make you think that reopening the economy is the only right solution.

Third, I ask myself, what would your mother think about that decision? I’m very fortunate to have great, understanding parents and both my mother and step-mom are nurses. My mother works in a long-term care facility that, thankfully, hasn’t had any positive cases. And still her work is still much harder than it ever has been. Last I checked, 33% of cases in New Hampshire are healthcare workers and I don’t know anyone in the healthcare field who has the gumption to say we should re-open for business and we can handle it. I trust them and want to keep them safe, so I will not endanger them. I’m sure my mother would agree.

Fourth, I encourage you to re-charge yourself socially in any safe way that you can. For me, it’s throwing myself into Rotary and getting to meet a lot of new people by phone and video calls. For my friends, it’s about having lawn gatherings or virtual cocktail hours. A good friend of mine is dating and has found someone that she’s really excited about with a virtual date. My social media feed is filled with humor, support and #covidkindness messages that are very inspiring. I value and love my friends more each day! I do not miss them, in fact, I’m more connected with friends from elementary school to friends in far-flung countries because we’re all in this together.

Fifth, and last bit of advice, find ways to give back to others. I recommend working with the United Way of Greater Nashua, making phone calls to friends who are anxious or isolated, or becoming trained through the Global Impact Group’s Volunteer Surge to help professional healthcare workers from your home or in the field. This is a vetted program and might not be right for everyone, but if you want to learn more, go to www.tgig.org. Giving back is the surest way to feel sane and that each day matters.

Thank you all for keeping me safe and each other by staying home. Thank you to the banks who are helping everyone to navigate this financial calamity. My last word to the wise is this: Don’t make a bad situation worse! We’ll be in this longer, we’ll have more economic loss through lost productivity of ill people and through untimely deaths. Be a leader by being kind to others and yourself and by supporting those you can.

I’m happy to be part of making the world better.

Samantha Cassista is a Rotarian, public servant and a strategy professional in Nashua.

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