Heloise

Dear Readers: Whelp, we’ve probably known about it for a while, and we just don’t like to face it or talk about it: debt. The average American has anywhere between $40,000 and $90,000 in total debt, many experts agree.

Debt can come from many sources, but a big reason for all of this debt is our relationship with money and how it connects with our emotional well-being. People suffering from anxiety, depression and/or untreated trauma can misuse money. This can include overspending, gambling and avoidance of legitimate debt and payments that are due. Steps to help? Here are a few:

— “Self-care” is a term we’re hearing a lot now. You must take care of yourself. Get enough sleep, but not too much. Get up and get out of bed every day and take a shower and get dressed. Eat healthfully, get some light exercise and spend time with supportive friends. If you are depressed, tell your doctor. There is no shame in that game.

— Face the facts. Don’t feel scared or overwhelmed, just sit down and understand where you are in your financial journey. Open those credit card statements instead of just putting them directly in the trash. Call the card companies and tell them you are struggling. They will listen to you and work with you, and I guarantee this: You will feel a whole lot better when you’re honest about what’s going on.

— Put yourself on a written budget, or work with a family member to help put yourself on a budget. You might need to cut back temporarily on a few things: i.e., gym membership, cable TV, weekly lawn service, pedicures. But where you are going (the land of Debt Freedom) is so worth the temporary sacrifice.

— Give yourself time. Getting out of debt will not happen overnight. But when you cultivate healthy money habits (a budget, waiting and paying cash for things, etc.), you set yourself up for the win! — Heloise

TECH TALK TUESDAY

Dear Readers: Let’s start a summer series on the basics of computing. Some of these terms and processes may seem simple to you, but they might be brand new for someone else.

We’ll begin with an easy one: the desktop. The desktop appears on your computer screen when you first turn your computer on. The desktop is made up of icons, or symbols, that represent images that you click on to begin programs, such as an internet browser or opening a word processing document. What should we define next week? — Heloise

THE CONSTANT

COMPLAINER

Dear Heloise: I have a lot of co-workers, family members and friends who complain a lot! It causes me anxiety and drains my energy.

I’ve learned to look them straight in the eye when they complain and say, without being rude, “Why are you telling me this?” This will focus the person on what is important, and if there is something that I can do to help, I will do it. But listening to someone complain constantly does not help anything. — A.M. in Colorado

HOME ALONE

Dear Heloise: I have a safety hint for those who live alone: When someone knocks on your door, before you open it, call out loudly, “I’ll get it!” This gives the impression that you are not alone in the house. — Peggy C., Cypress, Texas

Peggy, brilliant! — Heloise

Send a money-saving or timesaving hint to Heloise, P.O. Box 795001, San Antonio, TX 78279-5001, or you can fax it to 1-210-HELOISE or email it to Heloise@Heloise.com. I can’t answer your letter personally but will use the best hints received in my column.

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