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PGA would be lots more fun with Woods sitting at home

By Hector Longo - Staff Writer | May 14, 2019

For months, this seemed like a splendid idea: Make the PGA Championship the second golf major of the year, not the last. Fill that sports void in May. Why wait until nobody is paying attention in late July/August?

And then “He” roared at Augusta at last month’s Masters, making this scribe absolutely miserable.

Now, this week’s PGA at Bethpage Black on Long Island feels like that extra trip to the buffet at Caesar’s, you know the one nobody really needs/wants.

“He,” of course, is Tiger Woods, the ultimate front-running, sports conglomerate-gone-wrong.

Tiger, everybody’s hero, somehow relocated the “A” game just weeks ago, at age 43. He returned to the form of his pre-drug, pre-sex addicted self.

You all ate it up.

(In my best Bill Murray “Caddyshack” voice):

“The crowd at Augusta, going wild … The Cinderella boy, about to become the Masters’ champion.”

The PGA Tour has its guy back. “Tie-gah” is the greatest.

Can you imagine the gallery on Long Island this week as Tiger goes for two straight?

You’ll hear those birdie roars in the Bronx. All for Woods, a louse of a human being who disrespects women and is lauded after it.

The PGA will certainly make the course Tiger-friendly. Expect wide fairways and non-PGA Championship level rough. Mother Nature has done its part, too, softening those often greens into Greater Hartford Open style shape.

Tiger is again the favorite to win. He will “captivate” America and the world this weekend.

And this reporter, will like he was a month ago, be sickened by it.

no reason to cheer

Not sure I get the celebration around these parts about Robert Kraft’s latest victory in Florida court where the judge in his solicitation case ruled all video evidence would not be allowed in the case.

Did anyone really think Kraft was in for “hard time” on a misdemeanor sex charge? Did anyone think he was going to have an issue beating the rap?

Phew! Thank goodness, Kraft won’t be sent up the river.

Seriously?

Hey folks, I once beat a ticket for not stopping at a red light. There was no victory dance for me. That hurts.

***

In my attempt to beat colleague Tom King to the punch, I am going with Bourbon War, if he indeed runs, in Saturday’s Preakness.

You may recall the in the Kentucky Derby, Tom, like myself, was all-in on Win Win Win two weeks ago.

At last look, WWW was stuck somewhere in the Churchill Downs mud.

***

Sad to hear of the passing Tuesday of comedian Tim Conway at the age of 85.

The man got me through many a dreary day as a child with his portrayal of Ensign Charles Parker, opposite Ernest Borgnine in the series “McHale’s Navy.”

Later, the two reunited in an animated way as Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy in the “Sponge Bob Square Pants” cartoon series, a fact that will forever link me with my 19-year old son in a special way.

Why bring up Conway in a sports column?

The man was “Dorf on Golf,” and if you can’t appreciate that, well you simply have no taste for the game.

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